When Forgiveness Becomes a Way of Seeing
Learning to Release What Was Never Ours to Hold
Weary Souls Need a Better Way
“Lord, give us a way of seeing forgiveness.”
That prayer rose in me recently—not as poetry, but as desperation.
Because few things exhaust the soul like unforgiveness.
Nothing drains the heart like carrying wounds we were never designed to hold.
Unforgiveness turns us into
judge,
jury,
and relentless detective—
replaying the scene, rewriting the narrative, searching for clarity that never comes.
We think withholding forgiveness protects us.
But Scripture tells a truer story:
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” (Proverbs 4:23)
Unforgiveness doesn’t guard the heart—it handcuffs it.
It isn’t self-protection—it’s self-imprisonment.
What Unforgiveness Actually Does to Us
Unforgiveness affects us far more than the one who hurt us.
It keeps pain present.
It closes the heart to love.
It fuels suspicion and fear.
It restricts our ability to receive grace.
It quietly drains joy and purpose.
Scripture names this clearly:
“See to it that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.” (Hebrews 12:15)
Every replay reopens the wound.
Every unpaid debt keeps us tied to the damage.
Forgiveness hands the wound to God.
Unforgiveness keeps it in our own hands—where it cannot heal.
Freedom always begins with release.
What Forgiveness Sets Free
Forgiveness is not denial.
It is not calling evil “good.”
It does not erase boundaries or force reconciliation.
Forgiveness is releasing to God what was never ours to manage.
“Do not avenge yourselves… but leave room for God’s justice.” (Romans 12:19)
Forgiveness opens the heart.
Restores tenderness.
Softens reactions.
Loosens the weight in our chest.
Frees the future from the chains of the past.
Jesus ties forgiveness to freedom:
“Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” (Luke 6:37)
Not because God withholds—
but because a closed hand cannot receive.
Forgiveness Reawakens Purpose
Unforgiveness freezes the story.
Forgiveness releases it.
“Let us throw off everything that hinders… and run with perseverance the race marked out for us.” (Hebrews 12:1)
When the heart is free, the soul remembers why it’s here.
Forgiveness may bless someone else—but it transforms you.
Reflection
Where has unforgiveness quietly worn your heart thin?
What burden is God asking you to release into His care?
Who do you need to forgive so you can walk freely into what’s next?
Prayer